I really hope that I will not sick again..I don't want to burden my parents and make them sad again.I want to be stronger now..The person who made me sick maybe dont care about me again because its only UNISEL.Not popular university.haha.I like that.To be low profile so that people will not jealous and to black magic to me.I hope Allah will help me to finish my study and I can hold the degree scroll.I will work with Karangkraf so that I will get free novels..Hehe

To all readers,don't cry.I know my story is very sad.

The saddest story you have ever read right.I will

make a novel.Insha Allah.Hahaha.I think that's all for now.Thank you for spending time reading my blog.

Thank you very much..Salam

I was so unlucky.So I had to stay in the 'hell'.

What to do..I had no choice.But in semester 2 I was okay.I gained spirit to study.But my result was so low.It's only 1.95.I had to repeat..I had to live in the hell again.I was so embarassed with other students.But I was okay during first semester.But then,it happened again.This time was worse than before.

I felt like to kill myself.Wanted to jump

out of my hostel.I felt it every night...

So I slept to avoid that feeling.My plan was same as last year.To fail.This time I did not enter class for many times,did not submit assignment.I was very sure that I woud fail and be kicked out from the hell.So I slept every night as usual.

My roommate talked bad about me.I knew that but I didn't care.As long as I didn't burden them.When the result out,

I was frustrated again.It's 1.90,better than before.How that be?

So I decided to stop.I told to HEP counter I want to stop.But they said I have to pay back the allowance,RM2500.

Oh my God,I dont have that money.So I changed my plan.I wanted to fail in exam.To get below 1.5,so that I would be kicked out of the 'hell'.So I didn't study at all.I just slept every night.From

8pm until tomorrow morning.I didn't care what people said.Because when I opened the book and wanted to study,I felt so depressed.I just wanted to histeria.So better I sleep.I would not give problem to other people.I did it until exams.I just answered a few questions.Many questions I left blank.

I was so confident that I would fail.

When the result was announced,I was so frustrated.I got 1.67.People thought I was sad because of my low result.But I was frustrated.Why not 1.5? My plan was ruined...

Alhamdulillah,I got Negeri Sembilan College Matriculation offer.I got biological science.I just entered the college.At first,it was ok.But after mid-semester I was sicked again.I got the same feeling.No spirit to live.

Furthermore,I felt so humble with other students.They came from good school suc as SBP,MRSM and so on.

But me,not going to school.I was so stressed and pressured by the environment,the lecturers and friends.There was a Chemistry lecturer who did not like me at all.She always

talk abou me in lecture hall,saying that I didn't qualify to enter that college.I was so sad.Everyday I would crying.

I wanted to stop study.I didn't want to live in the college anymore.I felt like I wanted to kill myself.I felt useless..

In 2008,I studied by myself at home.I took Tuisyen Adabi Gaya Pos.I did the exercises and sent to them.The tutors would checked and marked.After that,they would post them to me.I studied like that until SPM exam. When I had exam,my parents were going to Mecca for hajj.So I stayed alone at home.My brother would only come in the midnight.So I tried to be independent.I woke up by myself at 5 am.I recited Yaasin everyday,before taking exams.Alhamdulillah,I was fine.I was not sick.I managed to finish my exams. Everything went smoothly.Alhamdulillah,I got 5As and 5Bs.Well balanced.Hehe.

 

When I was in form 5,I was sicked again.

This time I did not scream.But I became extremely passive.I didn't want to talk to anyone.I didn't have spirit to live anymore.

I'm feeling like dying..I was hospitalised at Hospital Klang for ten days.My mother took care of me.I was not eating.So they gave me water through tube..After that,I just stayed at home.It took a few months to recover.I was not taking SPM.I decided to take it next year..

But unfortunately,I was sick when I was in form 4.I was disturbed by another 'creatures'.One night I felt like I'm dying..Something pulled my soul out of my body..from feet to head and finally the heart.When my heart started to stop beating and my body cold,I told to my mother who slept beside me to let me go and forgave my sin.She said she wouldn't let me go.She gave me drink.After that I became more sicked.I screamed and scolded everyone.I was sicked for 6 months.My parents took me to many traditionaldoctor to cure me.After 6 months,I schooled again.Although I was not school for 6 monts,but I still be the best student of form 4.

Hehe show off...